Rhia Charles, high class escort in London

Boob Men & Breastology

Do you remember this pic?  I took it last year I think,  with a point and shoot camera whilst looking in the mirror and no bra  involved – just a latex dress.  Puppies spring to mind. This is one of those outfits that has to be confined to the boudoir and has never, ever seen the light of day.  I am a laydee dont you know!  (well in public anyway ;)  Now, as you very well know, I like to keep abreast (groan!) of all things saucy, and as I have already addressed and discussed briefly the needs of the bum man, here’s a little piece you may find fascinating if your thing is…

Breastology
An Essay

by Wayne Wallace

Breasts, boobs, tits, hooters, yahoos, yabbas, knockers, chi-chi’s, ta-ta’s, mammaries, and any number of other names have given to those beautiful symbols of female sexuality over the years.  I love breasts.  In fact, I have made an exhaustive,  personal study of the female breast for the better part of forty-five years.  I am, and always have been, a member of that elite group of men who are known as “boob-men”.  (I suppose that in the interest of political correctness I should acknowledge here that there are probably a number of women who might fall into this category as well, effectively changing the term to “boob-persons”).

During this forty-five year period, I have been engaged in an avid study of the female breast.  I don’t feel that my study of breasts is an obsession, for I am able to function in society without too many embarrassing incidents concerning the observation and study of the twin mounds.  I must, however, plead guilty to my wife’s accusation of always beginning a visual inspection of any woman, with an appraising look at her breasts.  Call this sexist if you like, call me a chauvinist pig, but this is honestly where my attention is focused and where the majority of my interest lies.

Of course, other areas of female anatomy appeal to me as well.  For example, a beautiful face is certainly an attention getter, or a nicely shaped butt in a tight pair of jeans has been known to turn my head.  I appreciate a shapely pair of long legs as much as the next guy, but, as I am enjoying and appreciating these attributes, rest assured that I have already checked out the boobs!  For me, these other enhancements merely add to the total package that the breasts headline.

The ultimate objective of most men (the hell with political correctness!) is of course that taco shaped universe that women sit upon, and around which, most men’s lives seem to revolve.  That part of the anatomy that has as many pet names as do the breasts, ‘the crown jewel” also has my admiration and respect.  However, the study of, the usage of, or the mere observation of this area requires far more time, commitment and risk than does the study of the female breast.   The study of the human breast is much more easily accomplished.  Some tact must be used when observing the female breast during “field studies”.  Blatant, open-mouthed, drooling stares, though not totally unheard of in my studies, are not considered gentlemanly behavior and certainly not in the best interest of the science of Breastology.

If one is discovered, observing the breast in its natural habitat, it is best to be discovered by the observee, than either by your spouse or the observee’s spouse or significant other.  The reason for this is the reaction of the various parties involved.  The reaction of your spouse is likely to be a punch and a “you never look at me like that” line.  The reaction of a rival male in this situation could be like that of a bull elk in one of those nature documentaries with all that head butting and antler rattling, etc.  The reaction of the subject being studied, usually, at its worst, merely results in a hand being placed on the neck of a low cut dress or an arm being pulled up to obscure the view of the breasts.  The most desirable reaction, although rare, is the willing smile directed at the observing “boob-person”.

I have often wondered why I have this “pointed” interest in the female breast.  It could be related to the fact that I was a breast fed baby and consequently, my earliest memories of the female breast conjure up such thoughts as nourishment, pacification, security, warmth, etc.  Assuming that this was the starting place for my interest and study, Junior High School certainly had to be the Basic Training Grounds of the science for me.

While puberty is changing a young man’s voice, causing acne problems and growing hair in previously barren areas, thoughts of breasts provide the necessary fantasy material needed for his struggle with sexual maturity.  I can remember being in 4th hour math class, staring at Mary Ann Mosely’s boobs, and daydreaming.  My sadistic math teacher, Miss Groffman, an old spinster woman of about 75, and by the way, whose boobs I NEVER checked out, called me to the board to reduce a fraction or something.  The very noticeable erection that I tried to conceal, became the laughing matter of the classroom for the rest of the semester.

National Geographic Magazine’s full color photos of African women’s breasts also served as an excellent resource for early study.  This of course, was in an era when Playboy magazines were not easily obtainable for pubescent males. Adding fuel to the fantasy fire were the Junior High girls, also struggling through puberty, whose newly developed boobs were often proudly displayed in padded bras under tight sweaters or white, transparent blouses.  That practice has not changed significantly to this day

As an avid breast observer, I often accompany my wife to any of the local shopping malls and wait, sitting on one of the benches while she shops.  This is the perfect observation post.  Ever wonder why all the old guys congregate there?  Young Ingenues may still be observed, sporting their newest, uplifting training bras in search of pubescent males with the intent of driving them out of their one-track minds.

During the late sixties and through the seventies, the “braless fad” afforded tremendous opportunities for the dedicated Breastologist.  It was during this era that I became a recognized expert as to  whether or not a bra was being worn.  I was often called upon to settle disputes, between old codgers waiting for their wives on a bench at the mall, as to whether a particular set of 38s were or were not holstered.

Just as Junior High school is the Basic Training Grounds for “boob-men”, High school is the early “field-study” area for the determined, life-long student of the female breast.   In High school, as dating becomes a possibility, being alone with a female “subject” in a car affords, at least the opportunity for advanced breast study and research.  One actually has the potential to touch, examine, and if one is extremely lucky, actually see, a pair of female breasts.  The search for the ideal female subject becomes the early goal of the high school age “boob-person”.  The criteria are these, in the order of their importance:

1.  Great breasts

2.  A willingness to allow extensive breast study and

observation for the benefit of science.

3.  Relatively attractive facial features.

4.  Someone not looking for a long-term commitment.

Young “boob-men” often plan their “field-studies” or dates around allowing adequate opportunity for observation and study.  Here is an example of a typical agenda for female subject field study.

Pick subject up at her house —————— 7:00 PM

Dinner at Restaurant —————————— 7:15 – 8:15 PM

Movie ————————————————— 8:30 PM – 10:30 PM

Private scientific observation & study —- 10:30 PM – 12:00

Subject home by 12:30 AM

The degree of scientific observation and study attained during these field studies is also recorded in degrees. ie:

Scientific Level Attained                                Study Accomplished

Level 1                                                             “Copped a Feel” – a light squeeze of either one

or both breasts through the clothing.

Level 2                                                             “Pressed the Flesh” – Actual contact with bare

breast, usually accomplished by inserting hand

into the bra.

Level 3                                                            “Nipple Contact” – Self explanatory

Level 4                                                             “Loosed the beasts” – Unhooked bra and

explored extensively.

Level 5                                                             “Visual Contact” – Actually observed the

breasts in their natural habitat.

Level 6                                                             “Tasted the Fruit” – Also, self-explanatory.

Attaining all levels with a subject may take several “field observations” to accomplish or they may all be accomplished in one encounter.  This usually is dependent upon the willingness of the subject to participate in the scientific study.  If all levels are accomplished in one field study, this is known as the “grand slam” of breast observation and is not only a very rare scientific event, but could actually lead to a chance encounter with the “crown jewel” about which I spoke earlier.  At this point in the field study, the researcher must make a decision whether to further his study of this subject, which in all probability would limit the student’s observation of other “subjects”, or to just move on to other subjects, in the interest of science.  This proves not only to be true for the dedicated “boob-man” but for exploration and discovery in general in most relationships from the high school age on through senior citizen status.