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The Anarchists are in Fortnums!

That’s the text I got last Saturday from a dear friend of mine.  ‘They bloody well better be out by tomorrow’ I replied – I had a very nice lunch planned with the very equally nice Mr.

So we had a bit of chaos again in London at the weekend – only  a few naughty people throwing toys out of prams, sorry throwing missiles through The Ritz etc etc.

Listen, I understand discontent, I understand angst I even understand anger ‘against the system’, whatever you may think that is.  I understand protest when it means changing a pointless and unfair  ideology.  I definitely understand ‘anarchists’ because I lived amongst them once.

What?  You?  Yes.   I decided at one stage of life, as you do,  to explore various ways of living, explore sub-cultures if you like.  That gave me all sorts of interesting life experiences;  living in a commune, in a remote village in Fiji,  a luxury lifestyle and also with new age travellers, oh and there’s more – life is for exploration, no?

The latter of those described above  is where you may bump into the ‘anarchist’. Anarchists believe in a stateless society, chaos. Here’s an interesting story about an interaction with an ‘anarchist’.

I lived in Kent for a little while.  Lovely place, lovely oast houses – gorgeous.  I was lucky enough to have a friend who had about 10 acres in the prime Kent countryside. Lush. Now then, said friend was a kind hearted soul and decided to let some ‘new age travellers’ place their vehicles on her land after they begged and pleaded with her.  Just for a couple of days mind.

So these ‘environmentally friendly’ folks disrespected her and the land by ravishing the space with their litter and suchlike and then swiftly buggared off to Glastonbury to party, leaving said unsightly vehicles behind.  Apparently its cheaper to all sleep in one van than take lots, and its all about saving money if you live off handouts.

But I am getting ahead of myself dear reader.  Prior to the buggering off of the anarchists, I was present at one of the ‘gatherings’ they have.  Some fella was pontificating about something as I walked in. ‘Dont you agree?‘,  he said. ‘Don’t know, dont know what you said‘ I replied.  ‘I was just saying that there is no such thing as property‘ he said grandly and with great aplomb, looking around and nodding his head at everyone for agreement  ‘Oh really?‘ I replied  ‘Interesting concept, let me think on that one’

So they buggered off to Glastonbury and my friend had twenty eyesores in the shape of cobbled together vans on her land. The council calls her again and again and tells her to get them removed or else. She calls these people, no response, she calls and calls, she texts, she tells them her plight, no response.

At the end of her very long tether, she crawls into the window of one of the vans and finds Mr ‘no property”s laptop and tells him that if he does not come back and remove his vehicle she will sell it.

Well, its remarkable how fast someone can get from Glastonbury to Kent. Rage and fury do not even go some way to describe this individual’s actions.  He came storming back ranting and spitting (he was foaming at the mouth)  about his laptop. Homicidal, I think is not too strong a word. [If you have any interest in anthropology I definitely suggest studying the lesser known self proclaimed 'anarchist']

‘Hang on, no such thing as property, right sweetpea?‘ obviously did not go down well when I said it. Its a good job I can look after myself – phew!

I understood what he meant, about property though.  For him there was no such thing as property unless it belonged to him  of course – Eureka!

Oh there’s more I could say but I hope you get the gist.  Hypocrites and malingerers, they are. They are always there, omnipresent but they usually keep amongst their ranks until a socialist-type demo gets organised – then they piggy-back on that and cause all sorts of nonsense because they can.

When we walked out from our lovely lunch we saw that they had broken most of the ground floor windows of The Ritz.  Do they know that people are actually sat behind those windows?  I have sat there many,many times.  They could maim or kill someone with that silly angst.  They daubed offensive material all over Fortnums, how dare they?  Don’t they understand that some of us may enjoy having somewhere nice to go.  No they wouldn’t understand that at all.  They try to make it ugly because they cant have it.