Archive for the ‘Life’ Category
Sunday, October 11th, 2009
I am not aware of this having any secret sexual meaning as in going ‘Greek’ or having a ‘French Polish’ (nudge nudge wink wink). No I think it just means paying half for something and this is the context in which I mean it today, ladies and gents.
When is going dutch appropriate?
Well, I think, obviously with friends, male and female and colleagues of course, family etc etc but an amour? No I don’t think so.
Call me an old fashioned girl but I like a gentleman to treat me like a lady – a princess if you will. Insisting on me paying half for a dinner is a tad unromantic isn’t it? I once got asked if I go dutch and I said ‘Do I look as though I wear clogs?’
Oh don’t get me wrong I am all for women having the right to do, you know, whatever, yadda yadda, yadda. But I really don’t think it diminishes a girl’s independence and dignity to have a nice fella buy her a prawn cocktail once in a while, do you?
I remember going out for dinner with a whole bunch of people and one of the guys had brought along his new lady. After we had had a charming meal and the bill came, he pulled out his calculator and started totting up the price of what she had eaten. Honestly. He then, to the utter horror of all at the table, showed her the part of the bill she would have to pay. He never saw her again.
He saw himself as a ‘new man’, a brother in feminism (that’s an oxymoron by the way :), a guy so firmly embracing the feminist ideal he is throttling it to death. We, on the other hand, the other diners, both male and female, forever saw him as a cheapskate. Someone with no generosity of spirit and frankly not very classy.
I guess it is pretty common these days, you know to go dutch. I blame it on HH and the feminatzi gang. Although they dont seem to mind the rest of us footing the bill for their dining extravaganzas and their husbands’ porn. I also guess I have been spoilt with my fellas, they always thankfully leave the calculator at home :)
Escorts in the Southwest
Posted in Etiquette, Life, London Courtesan, men | No Comments »
Sunday, October 4th, 2009
No it was not some steamy session!, here is what happened. A kind Sir brought me a lovely bunch of lavender from his garden. It reminded me of France. I decided to let it dry out and kept it in a glass pot on the window sill. The other day, I was joyfully getting ready for Mr B to arrive. Mr B likes to come around for a nice dinner. Roast Lamb is his favourite, so roast lamb it was.
The food was cooking nicely, everything was prepared. I had had a lovely bath and pampering session and my next job was to light the candles. ‘Oh’ thought I, ‘Why dont I pop a little tea light in the bottom of the pot, where the lavender is?’. ‘Then, the beautiful aroma of the lavender will drift up with the tea light heat and that will be lovely’. Wont it?
Except that the dried out lavender caught alight and when I happened to walk into the living room, there was a mini fire on the window sill. Luckily, it hadnt caught the drapes. I was cool though, like the cucumber, and just threw a damp cloth over it and left it. Dippy, me? Not usually :). Oh just had a thought maybe I should have left it and called those handsome fire fighters out ;)
10 points to the reader who spots the connection of this story with the pic – the late but lovely Jim Morrison.
PS. Fully booked for London in December, almost fully booked for London in November, some dates left for Dubai in December. Full info HERE my lovelies x
Posted in Life, London Courtesan, The Client, The Southwest, Woes | 1 Comment »
Sunday, September 27th, 2009
Oh, we all knew it was coming and I (which is very unlike me) firmly ensconsed my head in the sand.
Actually, I was joking to a few people that if my TV got stolen, I would not even notice for about 3 months. haha haha. (in a cocky jokey manner)
Actually, I dont watch it. Not really, not anymore. I dont want to sound like one of those intellectual snobs but I just havent had the time and besides that, its all rubbish on there anyway these days. Isnt it? I used to love Shameless and Desperate Housewives, oh and of course Sex and the City (please tell me if any of those come back on).
I used to though, watch TV. Loads of all sorts of nonsense ( I blame it on my student days – why is it ‘endearing’ for students to watch crap and for other people it is ‘mindless nonsense’? anyway, as usual, I digress) So, some other things came into my life and therefore TV and most of the stuff on there became obsolete, took a back seat as it were.
Soooooo, when this switchy over business came into play; and I was only told this by one of my fellas – ‘Try and turn the TV on’ he says ‘Go on, you wont get a signal’ - ‘Oh I dont care’ says I, I’ never watch it anyway’.
When he left I kind of went into a little panic. Oh what if I want to watch something, what if I get bored? What if, what if?. Stop. Actually I spent two years of my life without a TV (yes I was an adult) and no it was not the end of the world.
So I run in and turn my TV on (the one I have paid no attention to for 3 months) and OMG!!! it is blank, a fuzz. Well, the world is over then. Its scary when you are disconnected, it really is. Whats even scarier is that I feel scared that I am disconnected because of a bloomin’ TV!
Now, I went travelling wth nothing more than a backpack, twinkly blue eyes and a smile for a year. TV or rather the lack of it did not bother me. In fact, when I came back I found it very odd that people would congregrate around a box rather than each other. I have never understood some people’s need for constant noise around them. I love peace and quiet. I really love peace and quiet.
So, in my panic I managed to contact a very nice lady from the digital switchover helplines ( set up exclusively for people like me :) – she was a doll and very kind and talked me through the whole thing – setting up the digital box anew etc etc. Thank God for angels.
Anyway, a little analytical thinking was in order here and I assume my disconcertion with the lack of TV was the fact that it was something taken away from me. We expect these things to be there all the time, in our society, even if we dont want them and feel out of the loop if they are taken away, it feels if we are not part of things anymore.
We may choose to be a part of these or not but we like the choice and its not nice when we are excluded. No one likes to be excluded. Thats my psuedo-psychological analysis on a simple thing like the digitial switchover. Hmmmmm.
Now then, I bet you cant wait to come and see me now hey? hahaha, I am not so deep and serious, honestly – I am a fun bunny – just you wait and see!
Oh and here’s one of those crazy signs to set you off nicely for the week ahead – have a good one!
Posted in Humour, Life, London Courtesan | No Comments »
Wednesday, September 16th, 2009
The very wonderful Mr I reminded me the other day of a blog post I said I was going to write ages ago. We were talking about Tom Watson and golf. I was saying that the commentators at Turnbury seemed to be incredulous that a ‘man of that age’ was doing so well and kept using that phrase. What?
This perplexed me somewhat. Call me naive but dont you get better with practice?, at golf as with many other things, I mean ;) So I would have thought that Mr Watson (at a mere and spritely 59) would be way ahead of those young whipper snappers. He looks fit, he is fit and he obviously plays a mean round of golf. I take it he has been playing for longer than a lot of the other guys have been alive and besides all that, he looks all smiley which is always a bonus whatever the age. :)
I wish he had won. I do. And I am very glad to hear that he has set his sights on the St Andrews Open in 2010 with a view to winning. (May have to put that on as a tour ;) Go Tom! (gets rah rah skirt and pom poms out)
On a sadder note… (no not that sad) Long standing readers may be wondering how my golfing techniques have developed. Well, I had a few lessons this year but on the whole, I am ashamed to say, I have not done as much as I should have. Pathetic really. I will though. I am planning a golfing day in Dubai and some more lessons locally, definitely.
But on a sexier note… Back to the fantastic fifties. Men are fab at 50 plus. Oh yes. Mature (sexy), wise (sexy), sophisticated (v sexy), successful (super sexy) well you know don’t you? You’ve lived a little, lived to tell the tale and are all the better for it. They say that 40′s are the new 30′s. That makes 50′s the new 40′s and you know what begins at 40 don’t you? :)
Posted in Golf, Life, London Courtesan, men, The Client, The Courtesan/Escort | No Comments »
Sunday, September 13th, 2009
Bill Gates recently gave a speech at a High School about 11 things they did not and will not learn in school. He talks about how feel-good, politically correct teachings created a generation of kids with no concept of reality and how this concept set them up for failure in the real world.
Rule 1 : Life is not fair – get used to it!
Rule 2 : The world doesn’t care about your
self-esteem. The world will expect you to accomplish something BEFORE you feel good about yourself.
Rule 3 : You will NOT make $60,000 a year right out of high school. You won’t be a vice-president with a car phone until you earn both.
Rule 4 : If you think your teacher is tough, wait till you get a boss
Rule 5 : Flipping burgers is not beneath your dignity. Your Grandparents had a different word for burger flipping: they called it opportunity.
Rule 6 : If you mess up, it’s not your parents’ fault , so don’t whine about your mistakes, learn from them.
Rule 7 : Before you were born, your parents weren’t as boring as they are now. They got that way from paying your bills, cleaning your clothes and listening to you talk about how cool you thought you were. So before you save the rain forest from the parasites of your parent’s generation, try delousing the closet in your own room.
Rule 8 : Your school may have done away with winners and losers, but life HAS NOT. In some schools, they have abolished failing grades and they’ll give you as MANY TIMES as you want to get the right answer. This doesn’t bear the slightest resemblance to ANYTHING in real life.
Rule 9 : Life is not divided into semesters. You don’t get summers off and very few employers are interested in helping you FIND YOURSELF. Do that on your own time.
Rule 10 : Television is NOT real life. In real life people actually have to leave the coffee shop and go to jobs.
Rule 11 : Be nice to nerds. Chances are you’ll end up working for one.
Posted in Life, London Courtesan | No Comments »
Wednesday, September 9th, 2009
I am constantly blown away by the kindness of my gents. Look at you with your total kindness to me! Kindness is not about giving to charity, it’s not even about feeling sorry for someone.
No, I think it is about recognising another human being and treating them with the same respect that you deserve yourself. I hope I am a kind person and if I am not, then I expect my friends to tell me. I think it is inherent, I don’t think you learn it from your parents or teachers – maybe you do – I didn’t.
Anyway, it’s a beautiful thing and I got to thinking about this and decided to find out what other thoughts were out there besides my own, you know, about kindness. Please add your comments to any of this. When you do that you will come across a foxy capture which says ‘what colour is an orange?’ – it is designed to shut those naughty and annoying spammy bots out and keep you, precious one, clasped firmly to my bosom – do not be foxed my lovely, it is not a trick, just say ‘orange’ :) x
Ahh Kindness….
Kindness is the act or the state of being kind and marked by charitable behaviour, marked by mild disposition, pleasantness, tenderness and concern for others. It is a recognized value in many cultures and religions. (wikopedia)
In Philosophy, kindness is interpreted as;
- According to book two of Aristotle‘s “Rhetoric” it is one of the emotions (see list of emotions), which is defined as being “helpfulness towards some one in need, not in return for anything, nor for the advantage of the helper himself, but for that of the person helped”.
- Philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche argued that kindness and love are the “most curative herbs and agents in human intercourse“.
- Kindness is considered to be one of the Knightly Virtues.
In Religon;
- It is considered to be one of the seven virtues, specifically the one of the Seven Contrary Virtues (direct opposites of the seven deadly sins) that is the direct opposite to envy.
- The Talmud claims that “deeds of kindness are equal in weight to all the commandments.”
- Paul of Tarsus defines love as being “patient and kind…” (I Corinthians).
- In Buddhism, one of the Ten Perfections (Paramitas) is Mettā, which is usually translated into English as “loving-kindness”. Tenzin Gyatso, 14th Dalai Lama wrote “my religion is kindness” and authored a book entitled “Kindness, Clarity, and Insight”.
- Confucius urges his followers to “recompense kindness with kindness.”
In Psychology:
In a study of 37 cultures around the world, 16000 subjects were asked about their most desired traits in a mate. For both sexes, the first preference was kindness (the second was intelligence).
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Saturday, September 5th, 2009
Electricity. I had a little power cut this week just as I was preparing for a gent. That is bad enough but I had to cancel this lovely gent once before last year and he had to cancel me the other week. So it seemed that the naughty imp we call fate was playing silly tricks again.
Yes I have candles, lots of candles but I was just about to make my preparations for this gent. I couldnt believe how much I rely on electricity. Don’t get me wrong, I know we can survive perfectly well without it. I myself spent a fair amount of time in remote villages in the South Pacific sans electricity. But now?, here? No I have to have it. I couldn’t have a bath/shower. I couldn’t use my hair dryer. I couldnt even phone the power company to let them know of the utter disaster that had befallen me as my landline was one of those that relies on electricity. Thank God for mobiles, but when the battery runs out and there is no electricity to charge it?
So I try and get the telephone number for the electricity company, only my internet connection has died – no electricity you see. Yellow pages then.
The Telegraph has suggested recently that widespread power cuts are on their way. I am off to buy generators and wind up hairdryers and solar powered phones, except they wont work because we dont get any sun. While I am at it I shall put together a car survival pack containing all the essentials for a quick trip up the M5 including 3 days supply of water, blankets, a funnel and an empty plastic water bottle (think about it), a stress management cd and some cadbury’s chocolate.
Plymouth Escort
Posted in Life, London Courtesan, Woes | No Comments »
Thursday, August 20th, 2009
Mr A was reading the weekend paper, The Times I think he said, a couple of weeks ago and saw the following little stories tucked away at the back, he immediately thought of me and of how they would tickle me (the stories) and he was not wrong! So thanks Mr A for the clipping. x
Under the heading weird but wonderful…
The Look of Lust
Men spend almost a year of their lives ogling women. Researchers have discovered that the average man stares at 10 women each day, a hobby that passes up 43 minutes. Between the ages of 18 and 50, that adds up to 11 months and 11 days!
Happy Hookers
The Chinese people trust prostitutes more than government officials and scientists, a survey has revealed. The poll of 3,400 people put sex workers in third place after farmers and religious workers. ‘The sex workers unexpected prominence on this list of honour is indeed unusual’, said the China Daily newspaper, which was not too discouraged. ‘Given the constant feed of scandals involving the country’s elite, this is not bad at all. At least the scientists and officials have not slid into the least credible category which consists of real-estate developers, secretaries, (secretaries??), entertainers and directors.
******* (twinned with ****) - this is priceless!
The Austrian village of Fucking, which has installed CCTV to stop visitors canoodling by roadsigns, has been advised to cash in on its fame by the German town of Wank. (Its true, I swear!). A guest house owner, Jurgen Stoll, said ‘I have so many visitors here at the Wank guest house that we have the mattresses all in a line in one big room for people to sleep on. Otherwise we couldn’t fit everyone in’
English speaking tourists have created a booming business opportunity. A tourist official explained; ‘There are Wank postcards on sale, although many people prefer to take their own Wank holiday snaps standing beside the Welcome to Wank sign.’ But the people of Fucking will be hard to convince. The mayor Franz Meindl has previously complained; ‘We don’t find it funny. We just want to be left alone’.
Hahahahaha – oh I cant stop laughing!
Warning for hornythologists
The secluded huts used by birdwatchers are becoming a favourite haunt of mating pairs. Now a wildlife trust has to remind visitors that the hides are for watching animals, not human hanky-panky. ‘There are certain things going on at nature reserves that shouldn’t’ says Rachel Shaw of the Lincolnshire Wildlife Trust. ‘A visitor heard certain noises coming from bird hides. Nature reserves are for quiet enjoyment only.’ Lincolnshire police confirmed the problem. ‘Up and down the country, hides are used for all sorts of things,’ said PC Nick Willey (no, honestly!)
Have a good weekend folks :)
Posted in Humour, Just Sauciness, Life, London Courtesan, The Client | No Comments »
Tuesday, August 18th, 2009
Mr D told me over a very fine lunch a little while ago that his aunt had been a Courtesan. Yes. Here is the story ( I know he wont mind me relating this, as at the time I gasped, ‘I feel a blog post coming on!’ as he was telling me and he laughed ‘Blog away!’ )
So, this was a lady who became very wealthy by virtue of her talents, but that is not the point. She had only a few well chosen suitors who took care of her handsomely and in return? Well, in return she made their lives easier, more passionate and also made them in turn very, very wealthy. How so? I hear you ask.
Apparently, she was the supreme hostess. She hosted the most magnificent dinners for the movers and shakers in this gentleman’s industry. She never actually ate at her dinner parties (Oh I dont like that idea!) because she wanted to ensure that she was totally attentive to all of her guests. She was fragrant, amenable and charming. These dinners were the catalyst for deals and mergers and hence made the gentleman in question very comfortable. Never underestimate the power of food, Dear Reader, or indeed the power of a talented woman ;)
I loved this story and I wish I had known her – I bet she had a tale to tell – like me ;) My lips are sealed though just like hers. x
Posted in Life, London Courtesan, The Courtesan/Escort | 1 Comment »
Sunday, August 9th, 2009
Commando? Y-Fronts, Boxers, Long Johns, Thongs (Oh No Dear God, NO! :), Briefs, Jockey Shorts? – Oh dont you fellas have a lot of choice these days?
You can probably guess that I am not a great lover of the male thong, disturbing flash backs of Peter Stringfellow on the beach in ‘that‘ thong are just too potent for me to ever embark on an even slightly nonchalent fondness for that particular article of insanity.
I am not even a great lover of the y-front despite the stirling efforts of Mr Beckham. Well done David. No really, WELL DONE!! Readers of the youthful variety will be totally oblivious to the fact that the Y-front used to be the cause of great mirth and scorn. Especially yellow nylon ones. I outdid myself oh special one this time and procured for you a purple pair of loveliness.
Here you go. I compromised because they have a fetching yellow trim thereby satisfiying the most discerning of y-front pant lover. I note that this one has an emblem on the front. I am desperate to know what it is. I think. If you know, do I want to know? Oh go on then :)
My favourites? Oh I love a nice boxer. Boxer shorts are very sexy, yes indeedy. I like the traditional 
cotton ones and I also like those tight ones, ′a la Calvin Klein. Oh I just came over all unneccesary!
Plymouth Escort
Posted in Life, London Courtesan, men, The Courtesan/Escort | 1 Comment »
This here blog thing started as a way to express my saucy self. But do you know what? There's more to me than the saucy bits! So herewith you will find all sorts of thoughts, anecdotes, ideas, funny things (lots of them), deep and meaningfuls - a mixture of everything really, just like life. I hope you like it here. I like it here. It's cosier if you are here too so stay a while - and make a comment when you feel the need; I like that x
